I didn't grow up in a city. I lived within an hour of a major city for most of my 6 decades of life.
So moving into one when I became an empty nester wasn't really on my radar.
Until it was.
As a decision maker, I haven't always given a lot of thought to some decisions I've made in my life. I am blessed - or cursed - to be able to act on decisions I make. I have the fortitude and financial means to correct most mistakes, which may make me more apt to jump at a simple thought.
So when I made the quick decision to move from the beach location where I raised my children and lived for more than 30 years, I moved right into the middle of one of the largest US cities.
I'm not going to lie, it was a little scary. I didn't understand the neighborhood decisions and moved to a neighborhood where my much younger nephew lived. It was his suggestion. This neighborhood, known for it's amazing food options was undergoing what many refer to as gentrification. The act of taking out the old and replacing it with the new. Something I and many others would come to love and despise.
I embraced city life. The ability to walk everywhere and leave my car in the lot. I loved the abundance of food options within 1 mile of my residence. I also took to and learned the public transportation system.
The belief that someone will judge you for riding a bus was a little bit hard to shake as living in the suburbs we were judged by the kind of car we drove. But I learned to get over that really quick. Buses and trains leave the driving to someone else and I get to read or knit. I couldn't have been happier.
Many of my friends thought I was nuts. "Melissa, you did this backwards. You're supposed to retire at the beach, not in a city".
Nope, I never was a beach person. Give me a mountain and a lake anytime. No regrets on that decision.
But crime! they said. You will get murdered living in the city! Everyone gets murdered.
I haven't been murdered yet but that was a concern I had. I spent the first year or so carrying pepper spray, holding my keys in my fingers and not staying out past 10. This is the life of being a woman in the US. Sad but true.
Now that I've been here a decade I've learned that the news tells myth's about cities and the inherent violence. Yes, there is violence here. Yes, there is violence in the suburbs. All you have to do is watch 60 Minutes, Dateline and other "news" shows to see where all the cutting up of bodies and violent deaths occur. City violence seems to be more random.
I'm willing to take that chance to have a life that affords me culture, real friendships with others who plan as much as I do, and the ability to walk almost everywhere and get what I want and need. And most importantly, access to different mindsets, different kinds of people and unending options to learn so many new things that make this life so much richer than the sameness of the suburbs that was my life before.
So please stay tuned as I add nuance to my shifting beliefs. The good, bad and ugly of moving from the screaming quiet of the suburbs to the literal screaming in a city. It's been an adventure.